Just last week, a coworker asked how high I rate the importance of communication in relationships on a scale of 1-10. When I responded “9”, her eyes got wide & she said, “Wow, that’s almost a deal breaker”. I just hunched my shoulders in response. How many relationships do we know that have ended due to poor communication, assumptions & emotional outbursts?!
And I guess I should thank the man in my life (at the time) for proving my point. We’d hit a recent bump in the road that could have been avoided had he expressed EARLIER what was going on. A change in the dynamic of our relationship, at this late stage in the game is unwanted, unfair & difficult albeit necessary and doable. Knowing this early on would have avoided a lot of emotional stress (on my part) & unnecessary roller-coaster rides. Women know when their man/boo/FWB is pulling back. When there appears to be no problems, such a move comes unexpected and without reason. Women tend to internalize things when there’s no other clear answer. A simple 10 min conversation would have allowed both parties to move forward relatively unscathed instead of one party feeling like a chess piece being moved backwards….or a piece of fine china going on the shelf after heavy use. While, I’m grateful the conversation finally took place, I wish it had occurred sooner…then there would be no ruffled feathers to smooth. This incident highlights the importance of communication.
My Brothas, since you are notoriously bad at communicating with the women in your lives (this comes from countless women complaining about the same things)….take this as free advice given with love. Communicate with your women early, openly & honestly. Women are highly adaptable creatures and will make untold concessions for whom they love. Avoid unnecessary drama & emotional roller-coasters. Respect her feelings & her position. TALK to her before you start back-peddling, leaving her scratching her head, reaching for tissues and wondering WTF?!
Communication is key and no relationship regardless of its dynamics can survive or succeed without it!